10 Simple Ways To Grow In Etiquette

Practical Steps Towards Growth

I appreciate tangible, simple, and practical steps towards growth. This is especially important for self-growth. I often get asked by the Finding Philothea community on IG how to grow in etiquette. I made a list of ten simple ways to grow in etiquette that you can implement this week. But first, let’s get at the heart of etiquette.

The Heart of Etiquette

The heart of etiquette is to grow in virtue. What is virtue? Virtue is a habitual and firm disposition to do good. Etiquette, the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group, should always “do good” and should be at the service of the good of the human person. With this end goal in mind, here are ten simple and practical things to do this week to grow in etiquette.

Ten Ways To Grow In Etiquette

1. When you talk with people this week, focus on them and what they are saying – don’t tune them out to try to think of what you’ll say next. You’ll notice your conversations and relationships will improve.
   
2. Read paragraphs 1803-1845 in the Catechism of the Catholic Church. These paragraphs delve into the truth and beauty about virtue and the fruits of practicing them. 
   
3. Reflect upon the person you know who exhibits good etiquette. What can you learn and imitate?
   
4. Practice elegance and grace even when no one is around: sit up straight, don’t walk from room to room looking down at your phone, don’t rush, chew with your mouth closed, walk gracefully.
   
5. Ask yourself, what is one thing I struggle with proper etiquette? Is it confidence, lack of knowledge, fear of public speaking, frustration hosting? Name it and set a tangible goal for yourself. Ex: If you struggle with public speaking, set a goal of introducing yourself to someone new this week after Church.
   
6. Review your schedule, plan ahead and show up on time to all your appointments and duties this week.
   
7. Exercise: go on walks, do a 5 minute ab workout, stretch for a few minutes! I noticed a huge improvement in my posture when I started to exercise.
   
8. Get ready for the day every day this week. Though good grooming looks different for each person (ex: putting on some clean clothes, a little accessory, doing hair or makeup), practicing good hygiene encourages us to present our best selves: mentally, emotionally, and physically.
   
9. Read the book Holy Hygge: Creating A Place For People To Gather And The Gospel To Grow by Jamie Erickson. This book gives practical ways to host with purpose, confidence, and joy.
   
10. Invite friends over for tea. Afternoon tea is one of my favorite communal ways to practice proper etiquette. It beautifully reflects the purpose of practicing etiquette – sharing the good and honoring the good in others.

Take The Time, Because It Takes Time

Practicing manners and etiquette is like exercising our muscles. It takes time to grow in strength and for it to become second nature. Virtue is built through good choices and good habits. Yet it is worth our time. Even if you can’t do everything on this list, choose one or two things to focus on. It will make such a difference in your week!